Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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