i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
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