i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
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