You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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