He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
