Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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