There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Randomize
