There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
