She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize
