ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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