I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
