Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
