dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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