well you can't waste a boner
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
