we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
