Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
