Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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