garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Please, let me fuck your mom
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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