Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize