just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize