dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
