So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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