I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
