guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize