he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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