we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
