Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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