Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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