I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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