I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
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