I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
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i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
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im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize