you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Enjoy the penises
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
