She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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