He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
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