After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
