I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Randomize
