Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
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And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
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Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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