I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
why is half of my head shaved?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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