marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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