By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
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