That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
