you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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