Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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