She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
