I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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