just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet