I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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