i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
