Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
my god I love twenty year old dicks
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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