i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
