i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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