Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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